Joining a tour group has always been the last thing on my mind, but I had little
time and no choice. So on the first day of Chinese New Year, I paid Y150 for a
Yangshuo and Li Jiang cruise and boarded a tour bus with Chinese tourists from
all over the country. Our guide was a young, scrawny guy by the name of Mr
Xiong. He said that in Guilin, people refer to their friends as “gou rou” or dog
meat. Well, I didn’t bother to check whether he was pulling our legs, but I
certainly had no problem calling him dog meat when the first spot he brought us
to was a rock gallery selling a gem called cat’s eye. Oh yes, it’s said to do a
lot of good things to you and frankly, I’m impressed with the beauty of some of
these cat’s eye stones. It’s just that those I fancy cost Y2000 upwards.
Our second spot was Dragon Cave in Yangshuo. At the entrance, there was a short
photography session. We were asked to pose like an idiot on a cement slab and we
didn’t have to buy the picture if we didn’t like it. I decided not to take. We
then got into a boat with another guide who took us into the cave proper. Some
people may not like the way the Chinese light up their caves with coloured
lights, but I think Dragon Cave was very tastefully done. The coloured lights
accentuatd the reflections on the water as well as the textures of the
stalactites and stalagmites. My apologies to the purists, but this was the most
beautiful cave I’ve seen.
Strange rocks are one of the many products of Guilin/Yangshuo. At the end of our
rocky tour of the cave, near the windy exit, was a little rock store selling
luminous rocks and even a yellow “jade” made into all kinds of ornaments. Most intriguing were the “meat rocks”. They look real enough to make pork lovers drool.
Strange rocks or tampered “rocks”? Some were ridiculously cheap. Some were
ridiculously expensive.
Next stop, was a Buddhist temple that looked pretty authentic. The guide at the
temple also gave a very good introduction to Buddhist principles. I was touched.
Then, came the interesting part. We were asked to pick a divination lot to tell
our fortune. It costs Y10 to have our fortune told. My intention of picking the
lot was to take the opportunity to make a small donation to the temple.
Apparently, the monk in charge of reading my fortune had something up his
sleeve.
“Judging from your birth and your facial features, you ought to be worth 8
figures by now. But looking at your hands, they suggest a lifetime of hard work.
No easy money for you…”
Money? Well, yes. I can do with a bit more, but I don’t need 8 figures. As a
Buddhist monk, he ought to be teaching contentment. But never mind, it got even
better.
“One way to improve your fortune is to get a “qiling” from the temple…”
The alarm bells went off. I thanked him for his advice. He asked me to light a
lamp. I almost did that without asking how much it would cost me. Y100. Oops. I
bravely told them I was not lighting and joined Mr Dog Meat on the bus.
Next, we went to a park to see the giant rong tree. Then, it’s lunch time at
Moon Hill. This is an interesting rock formation looking like the arch of a
bridge. Lunch at this restaurant serving “farmer’s cuisine” was covered up to
Y10. This meant that Y10 would be deducted from our final bill based on what we
ordered. Guess what. Nothing on the menu cost less than Y10. Mr Dog Meat’s
strategy. Never for one moment believe that the guide is on your side.
After lunch, we went on a cruise on the Li Jiang. There wasn’t as much rain as
the day before, but the sky was cloudy and the distant peaks obscured.
Otherwise, I would have agreed with with anyone who says 桂林山水甲天下. The
water in the Li Jiang was emerald green and relatively clear. Nearby, the peaks
present themselves as sheer cliffs and walls put there to guard an invaluable
treasure or secret. In the distance, they resemble fingers of the Buddha from
which even the Monkey god could not escape.
It was cold on the small boat, but I had to open the window to try to capture
the stunning scenery with my camera which lacks imagination. Under such
conditions, the mind can fill in the details, but the camera can’t. It’s a pity
that the weather wouldn’t cooperate.
We returned to Xingping to board our tour bus. Next destination – military site.
Yes, these folks mean business. In the interest of national security, no
photography. We were shown the Chinese tank that had a certain indestructible
thickness of armour and a top speed of 80km/h. We were shown artillery shells
that could destroy anything. Chinese military hardware – best in the world. Feel
proud to be Chinese … then, we were led into a demo room. We were shown an
artillery shell and the kind of high tech alloy that went into its construction.
The same alloy was used to make … the kitchen knives that were on sale at the
facility! I was stunned by such creativity.
Next was a demo that we’ve all seen before at supermarkets and departmental
store. Carrots were shredded. leather was cut. Wood was stripped. And for a
limited period only, the whole set with free gifts cost only Y198. Wow! I’m
impressed. Not by the capabilities of the knives or the tank, but the sales
tactic. Amazing!
And if you think all over. Not yet. Before we could leave the facility, there
was one last room. And what did they sell there? The same stuff that was sold in
the cave. Strange rocks. Confectionery at inflated prices for the “benefit” of
those who hadn’t checked them out at the unpretentious stores in Guilin.
Well, Mr Dog Meat wasn’t that bad. Even though I didn’t buy anything, he still
sent me back to my hotel. Squid hot plate for dinner that night. Leaving for
Nanning the next day.
